SVRG Dot.Kamikazes dominate ACDG Rocket Queens, 209-45

Posted on August 8th, by demonic in SVRG Bouts. 1 Comment

It's a girl! SVRG's Death by Dollface, Rot Wheels, and Aim de Kill contain the ACDG defense while birthing jammer Pia Mess.

It's a girl! SVRG's Death by Dollface, Rot Wheels, and Aim de Kill contain the ACDG defense while birthing jammer Pia Mess. Photo credit: Jim Cottingham

This past Saturday, SVRG hosted the Angel City Derby Girls’ Rocket Queens at San Jose Skate. A turn in unseasonably cool August weather heated up the venue, but thankfully there was plenty of Pabst Blue Ribbon and Faultline beer to keep the crowd cooled off.

This bout was a notable event for two skaters: First, Death by Dollface made her triumphant return to the track. Not only was she the typical terror on wheels in the pack, but she also took a couple of turns jamming—and grand slamming—scoring a 15-point jam and then closing out the game with a 20-point jam. Second, this was blocker/fear-invoker The Beast’s first bout on the Dot.Kamikaze roster this season, and she brought down the house…not to mention a number of Rocket Queens. My personal favorite moment of the bout was looking up to see a downed Beast springing up from the floor, catching up with the pack, and singlehandedly taking out the Rocket Queens’ 4, then their 3, and then the jammer, all within a half-lap of the track…phenomenal.


These ain't no sugar walls. Left: Death by Dollface and Rot Wheels pin back a Rocket Queen jammer. Right: Feisty Irish and Pia Mess partner up at the back of the pack. Photo credit: Jim Cottingham

Indeed, SVRG’s defense stalled the ACDG jammers. While blocking, Pia Mess buzzed around jammers, keeping them engaged long enough to secure the SVRG jammer a grand slam before ACDG could manage a scoring pass. Aim De Kill, Rot Wheels, and BootyVicious often controlled the front of the pack, while Feisty Irish hovered near the back, keeping ACDG neatly contained. Donna Diggler and SKooter Ov’r delivered swooping hits while Rot Wheels picked Rocket Queen blockers off the line, insuring safe passage for the SVRG jammers. The SVRG defense was so successful that they held ACDG scoreless in 21 of the 34 jams, and ACDG only scored more than 4 points in a jam once.

Booty evades

BootyVicious stays low and balanced as she gracefully evades a killer hit. Photo credit: Jim Cottingham

Offensively, SVRG was unstoppable. Eleven of SVRG’s 14 skaters took a turn at the jammer line. Aside from usual jammers Smack Dahlia, Smashleigh aka Smashes of Evil, Terribelle Demise, and Pia Mess (who raced to a 19-point jam), Dot.Kamikazes Feisty Irish, Juicy K. Tore, BootyVicious, Death by Dollface, Lizapalooza, SKooter Ov’r, and team captain Rot Wheels (who scored a 15-point jam) all donned the star cap. SVRG completed eight jams with 10+ points.

You can see more amazing photos from the bout at Jim Cottingham's site here.

SVRG would like to thank our amazing coaches, Pandamonium, Left Turn Only (so glad to see you running around again!), and Pia Mess. Thanks to the Angel City Rocket Queens for making the trek up to see us. Thanks to our amazing bout coordinator and totally-on-it crew: Lizapalooza, Death by Dollface, Frida Khill*ya, and Broken Babydoll, plus all the other SVRGs working their buns off. Special thanks to our wonderful zebras Texas Tea Bag, Jonny Demonic, Hannah Grenade, Hue Refner, Ulrich Von Hurtem, Winnie Baygo, and Randy Eye Candy, and our herd of NSOs: Jacques Strappe, Se7en Year Bitch, Frida Khill*ya, Sam Hain, Rocky Launcher, Dorothy Vader, Cole Cocked, Mauly Anna, Lindsay Lohanded, Organ Doaner, ChanaSaw Massacre, Belle Wringer, Frisky Business, and 18 Wheeler. Special shoutout to our girl (and NSO) Needles Fever! Thanks to our fab announcers: SVRG’s own Lip$tick Bandita (can’t wait ‘til you’re back on the track, chica), radio host Teddy Bynum, and the always fabulous, multi-talented Timothy Jordan. Thank you Dr. Tony Kearns for keeping us all together. A final thanks to all of our volunteers, sponsors, and fans—we couldn’t do it without you!

One Response to “SVRG Dot.Kamikazes dominate ACDG Rocket Queens, 209-45”

  1. Lizapalooza says:

    Ummm... The Beast played with the Dot.Kamikazes last year in Bakersfield. Although I can't remember if we had came up with the name back then.